ArcaMax

Intimacy versus individuality sounds like a choice ... as if maybe you will find one or the other in your love life, but you know for sure you can't have both of them in the same relationship! That's the (yawn) fiction that's been circling the single world for generations. But the truth is not only is it possible for the same relationship to ...Read more

A few years ago, a friend of mine asked if I'd be willing to be the emergency contact for her kids at their school. I told her it would be an honor to be a part of her village.

We say it all the time: "It takes a village." But we rarely stop to consider what that actually means. We long for community and a sense of belonging, for people to show...Read more

A recent letter in this column has stirred up a virtual hornet's nest. It comes from a 30-something man who -- vigorously and rather unpleasantly -- stakes claim to nearly all parenting rights and privileges in his (hypothetical) marriage. At the moment, he's neither husband nor parent. But he has thought through the battles he'd wage. Example: ...Read more

As millennials, we were told not to have kids until we were financially responsible. The world had to be just right. Our careers should be stable. Our savings, sufficient. Our ducks? In a row. Yet, the same generation that was warned about the unpredictability of parenthood was also sold on the idea that homeownership was the key to stability. ...Read more

I read in women's letters the signs of their struggle to find an answer to their quandary. The feeders of the race, the gender asked to nurture those around them, women today are asking for -- no, insisting on -- emotional reciprocity. At the same time they confide in me their fears, they insist they will not settle for less than partnership in ...Read more